It’s official, I’m a masochist.

There’s is this professor in the history department at school. She’s really nice, sweet, young, etc. You can tell she loves what she does, and really does try to help students understand difficult concepts. Oh, and she’s a ridiculously easy grader. Her tests are all term identification, and if you can make flashcards you can get an A. I see her all over the place, work, Starbucks, even getting a mammogram, and she always smiles kind of like she thinks she knows me but isn’t sure. She sounds perfect, right?

Except for one thing- she’s so boring that I often want to open a vein right there in class because watching myself exsanguinate seems more interesting than whatever she’s droning on about.

I’ve taken two classes from her- my 1960s class and a cultural diversity one. Very few people can make LSD and orgies and EVERYTHING ELSE THAT HAPPENED during the 1960s seems boring, but damn, she can do it.

Well, you ask, if you hated 1960s so much, why did you take the next class from her? Ah. Remember the grade thing? I needed a cultural diversity class and I needed an A. And we were signed up. It was during this class that I understood the true nature of her dullness- it was a straight lecture, no witty TA to act as a buffer as there had been with 1960s. To make matters worse, it was at the end of the day (read: I skipped half the classes and the other half were devoted to Facebooking). Thinking back on this class, I am filled with a sense of sick dread, such was the extent of the horror.

About an hour ago I was checking my e-mail and discovered one regarding my constitutional law class in the fall. It turns out that “due to unforeseen circumstances” the class has been turned into an online class. I took an online class last semester, and while it was not horrible, it wasn’t great. I didn’t learn as much as I would have in a lecture setting, and my grades were generally lower (although I still got an A). But more than that, if they offer this class as lecture again, I won’t be able to take it. So I decided to find something else.

Because it’s, oh, THE END OF JUNE, there are approximately three open classes at UWM, two are Jewish history (already have one this semester, and that’s about all my shiksa ass wants to take)- but the last one, oh, the last one. It’s American Constitutional Development, a 400-level history class. It’s pretty much the same class, except it will count as advanced credit towards my major. It’s even offered at exactly the same time as my previous con law class.

Sounds perfect, right?

Guess who’s teaching it.

Yep. I will be taking a third class from the most boring professor I have encountered in the five years I’ve been taking college classes. THREE. T

I have had some amazing professors, professors who have inspired me, professors who probably could have smiled at me and I would have committed adultery with them RIGHT THERE (these are not all the same professor, just letting you know…), and yet I have NEVER TAKEN THREE CLASSES WITH THEM.

So fall semester- stay tuned.

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