The books. They talk to me.

I’ve been using this GRE study guide for a while. It’s the typical, huge, clinical study guide. Full of practice tests and chapters devoted to explaining the sections and the most personal thing in it is an admonition to eat breakfast the day of the test. Honestly? This is a graduate school test. You can’t just trust us to eat if we’re hungry?

Since I registered for the test, though, I’ve been hitting several different books from different companies including, my favorite, GRE for Dummies. I love this book. I want to have this book’s babies. It’s not-at-all-condescending babies.

Because the study guide is mean. It’s all, well why don’t you remember how to factor a polynomial? You had to ask your little brother for help? You fail. At life. And oh, yeah, you’re fat, too.

The Dummies book is like, you’re okay. Calm down. Seriously- keep breathing. You have other gifts. You are still a functioning member of society, even if you had to text your 16-year-old brother from work saying “omg we’re doing quadratic equations when I get home”. Seriously. Breathe. You’ll be fine. Also? You’re pretty and not at all bloated.

I think I’m only going to work with the Dummies book from now on. Because REA clearly wants to ruin my life.


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