Teaching 101

I’m in the process of editing the final draft of my thesis. This is a little bit headachy, because it’s long and there are lots of words and my goodness do I have problems using the correct tense!

But never fear! Because I have bunches of drafts full of helpful comments from my advisor.

Or…not.

Because it turns out that he just enjoys writing in the margins.

For instance,

“Not to doubt Cornwell’s honestly, but I have worked in the Vatican archives and no one ever asked me why I was there.” Oh. How nice for you.

“He wasn’t a very good Hitler Youth member.” Yeah. I know. That’s why I spend the next paragraph writing about how he wasn’t a very good member.

“I probably don’t have to tell you this, but his was considered the seminal papacy in Judeo/Chrsitian relations.” No, you don’t have to. Was it the fact that I spent twelve pages writing about his papacy that convinced you? Or when I came to your lecture about him even though it was at the same time as Criminal Minds? But thanks for clarifying!

“Hitler was Catholic the way Matthew was Jewish, if we may say so.” You have a PhD from the Ivy League. You may say anything you like. I, however, am not actually writing about the synoptic gospels.

“For what it’s worth, I discuss this in book I recently published…” Sure. I’ll rush right out and get it. From the library. I like you a lot, but that $26.95 could be spent on something from Vera Bradley. Your book on the Catholic Church in Poland is not pretty and quilted.

Obviously they don’t teach you constructive criticism at Yale.

Next time I’m just going to write my phone number on the title page. If you want to chat, just text me. I have unlimited texting. Printing off 60-page drafts so you can tell me about your scholastic achievements is getting a trifle expensive.

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