Reasons I’m only masquerading as an adult.

1.) I only put gas in my car when I want the free coffee.

2.) My birthday list includes the following things- season four of Psych on DVD and gift cards from Kohl’s because in three weeks I’m going to need to convince 100 children that I’m an authority figure and I NEED NEW CLOTHES TO DO SO AND I’M POOR DAMMIT.

3.) I have a birthday list. Period.

(That’s not really my fault. It was requested.)

4.) The Nanny has been on TV Land all weekend. And I’ve watched a good eight hours of it.

5.) The part about graduate school that I’m most excited about is not the salary, amazing teaching opportunity, or the ability to further my career. It’s that I can still go school supply shopping.

6.) I couldn’t figure out how to make a lasagna if you threw the noodles at me.

7.) I had to google (literally) “how many tablespoons are in 3/4 of a cup?”  this morning.

8.) Ke$ha’s new single is the first song on my iPhone’s on-the-go playlist. Following by Enrique Iglasias’ “I Like It.” I know. Not even classic Enrique.

9.) Furthermore, when put on shuffle, my iPhone repeatedly begins with either Shakira’s “Waka Waka” or Katy Perry’s “Teenage Dream.” Like it knows my secret shame.

10.) I feel that whole only-putting-gas-in-my-car-if-I-can-be-bribed-with-coffee-thing bears repeating.


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