You know, after I ran away from the students. Pssh. Please. That was last Friday. I was all prepared today. I even was wearing clothes that were vaguely professional and didn’t have coffee on them.
I know, right? ADULTHOOD. I HAS IT.
Except for the part where…I totally don’t. Like, I vacillated between not being able to eat anything all day yesterday to being all MOAR CAKE at about eight o’clock at night…and the fact that I thought about painting my nails but decided eh, I really don’t want to consume that many chemicals and I pretty much have been gnawing on my nails like woodchuck for a week.
Okay, yeah, there was that moment this morning when I was sitting at Mass (totally paying attention. I swear. It was…something about Mary? Oh! Nativity of the Blessed Virgin! See, I got it.) and thinking, “I could go home. I could go home and take a nap and not have to deal with talking to students who are actually my students yeah, nap sounds good.”
But I didn’t! I drove to school and pretended to be an adult and I pretended so well I even believed it myself for awhile.
No, really. I surprised myself by doing the teacher Hi!-I-have-no-idea-who-you-are-but-I-want-to-help-you! smile when people came up to me at the end of class. Whoa. My mind=BLOWN. I was so surprised that I kind of felt like announcing that to the student who was talking to me, but I didn’t. Because I’m an authority figure.
And yeah, speaking of authority figures, I’m pretty sure the reason they don’t let you friend students is not because of blurred boundaries or anything like that but rather so that they don’t see your statuses. Such as:
“Oh. God. Want. To. Die.”
“I could quit. I could just quit grad school. I don’t need this. My bachelor’s in Jewish Studies is totally marketable.”
“SERIOUSLY GOING TO THROW UP NOW.”
“I didn’t throw up on the students.”
(Only one of those was a real status, FYI.)
(BUT THEY ALL COULD HAVE BEEN.)
It helped that my sister texted me “Remember: You have health insurance. They have gonorrhea.”
I don’t know how that could not help.